Advice needed - disappointed with her

[pleasurehunter]

Hi all,

I'd like to have some advice from you. My girlfriend and I have been together for over 2 years, and we love each other. We do some femdom stuff: sometimes she keeps me on a chastity belt for a couple of days, she often facesits me, I'm completely dedicated to her on bed, and I try to treat her as a queen.

However, she is quite fat. I've never been a fan of BBW, but I grew to admire and desire her body (and end up enjoying some BBW porn). Nonetheless, it still bugs me off... I sometimes feel disappointed when I stop to think about her appearance. She'd incredible hot if only she lost some pounds (not a few).

I feel very guilty when I think these things. I see her as my Mistress, it's horrible for me to have any negative thoughts on her. What can I do to accept her condition better and be a better slave?

[sinbad]

ph, this is a tough one bud. Has she always been a large lady, or has this happened over time? Eitherway it's a very delicate situation.

[undrneath1]

Life is too short to settle for anything less than what you truly desire.

You could mention to her how much you love her and want to be together for a long time and therefore bring up the long term health benefits there would be in her losing weight.
But whether it's exercising more or just eating healthier, you need to do it with her as well.

[Yuliya Kate]

Okay, here is a practical advice:

1) Talk to her to find out if she wants to lose weight. Encourage her, tell her that she would look even hotter if she gets slimmer;

2) When you know she is ready to do it, get her THIS breakfast:

http://www.holycrap.ca/

This thing is amazing in many many ways.

3) After she knows she can have little food and feel full, take out of her diet things like:
white bread, pasta, potato;

4) Now, when you have gone this far - time for exercise :)

Don't give up, it's hard to find a good connection. Sex - easy, but not connection and intimacy.
I really hope you will work this out!!

[Ariel Black]

I totally get that! My partner is large too and I find it hard to get turned on etc. I feel awful saying stuff like that too. Guess you gotta figure out what you really want.

Ariel Black

[sfcl31282]

well, I think, before you tell her that she's fat, or that she need to lose weight, no matter how you present it to her, she will end up thinking you're not turned on by her anymore... believe me.

so, before you say anything to her, ask yourself some questions.

1. what if she really don't take it well, what if she say, fuck you, what if she just decide to get out of your life, can you manage this?

2. she might agree, but still might be hurt at what you will tell her, so you will need to give her time.

3. is she the type of person to over react, if so, i don't, really don't believe telling her she need to lose weight a smart idea.

4. She might deny you sex for some time, you need to be ready for this too.

5. what if she tell you, well I never been into that femdom thing, was just doing it for you because I loved you.

6. If you think that you might have something that could bug her too, be prepared that she could shout it at you

7. If you are slightly over weight, even if it’s not as bad as her, don’t tell her she need to lose weight.

8. on the other hand, you count in this, if it bug you big time, then, you need to bring the point to her, but, you need to be prepared for point 1.

all i can say is, good luck with this, i sure wouldn't want to be in your shoes.

Oh and by the way, it’s not just because your lazy, or eat bad things that you end up overweight, sometimes it’s a matter of genetic, other time it’s medical, she might have tried earlier in her life to lose weight, but wasn’t able, so, if it’s her case, I don’t think she will appreciate you telling that she need to lose weight.

[darkindiantrampleguy]

its best to like her the way she is or find someone who better suits your needs, tough decision for anyone.

[Kell6]

@pleasurehunter: Charlie?

@darkindiantrampleguy: Prem?!

lol

[MDtoiletslave]

Hi all,

I'd like to have some advice from you. My girlfriend and I have been together for over 2 years, and we love each other. We do some femdom stuff: sometimes she keeps me on a chastity belt for a couple of days, she often facesits me, I'm completely dedicated to her on bed, and I try to treat her as a queen.

However, she is quite fat. I've never been a fan of BBW, but I grew to admire and desire her body (and end up enjoying some BBW porn). Nonetheless, it still bugs me off... I sometimes feel disappointed when I stop to think about her appearance. She'd incredible hot if only she lost some pounds (not a few).

I feel very guilty when I think these things. I see her as my Mistress, it's horrible for me to have any negative thoughts on her. What can I do to accept her condition better and be a better slave?

No disrespect intended....If you have been together for 2 years, why did you start dating/sseing each other if you were not physically attracted??? And if you were attracted in the begining what has changed???

I have been happily married for over 15 years, and in the begining my wife was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen....But there is so much more to her than just her physical appearance. As we enter our 40's I know she will not win any modeling contests, and as we have put on a few pounds I know mens heads don't turn when she walks by....but she remains the most beautiful woman I have ever seen! She is so much more than just her looks (which I still like!!!)!

If physical attraction is the the main focus or driving point in any relationship, after a while you will be disappointed as even the sexiest of individuals age....hopefully your relationship can be based upon more than just the physical, and you can both discover the true beauty that only those who become truely intimate ever discover.

If you are not able to get past it know you would probably do both yourself and her a great service by moving on before the relationship progresses or deepens for her..

Just my opinion for whatever it is worth!

[sony]

physical appearance isn't everything mdtoiletslave, but fucking something you're not attractive too and can't get a hard-on for, you'd have to admit the relationship isn't gonna last long...just be like honey, your gettin' kinda fat, or leave her, don't string her a long for a bigger hurt later on.

[MDtoiletslave]

physical appearance isn't everything mdtoiletslave, but fucking something you're not attractive too and can't get a hard-on for, you'd have to admit the relationship isn't gonna last long...just be like honey, your gettin' kinda fat, or leave her, don't string her a long for a bigger hurt later on.

I would agree...but then why would you start a relationship with someone you were not remotely attracted to in the first place??? If you were attracted in the begining what has changed...that is the point...he entered into a relationship and has been getting his own needs met, and now he is not content. There are a whole lot of people not emotionally mature enough to have serious relationships....my hunch is it has less to with her or her looks than with the other!

Just my take